Master minor programme thesis English linguistics: Translation quality evaluation of Ankit Panda’s article "why did China set up an oil rig within Vietnamese waters? Why now and why Vietnam?" by four various translators

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In this research, an attempt will be made to review the quality of EnglishVietnamese versions in terms of conveying the intention of the author, and then recommend some criteria for better translation of political articles.

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Nội dung Text: Master minor programme thesis English linguistics: Translation quality evaluation of Ankit Panda’s article "why did China set up an oil rig within Vietnamese waters? Why now and why Vietnam?" by four various translators

VIETNAM NATIONAL UNIVERSITY, HANOI UNIVERSITY OF LANGUAGES AND INTERNATIONAL STUDIES FACULTY OF POST - GRADUATE STUDIES ************ NGUYỄN THU HẰNG TRANSLATION QUALITY EVALUATION OF ANKIT PANDA’S ARTICLE “WHY DID CHINA SET UP AN OIL RIG WITHIN VIETNAMESE WATERS? WHY NOW AND WHY VIETNAM?” BY FOUR VARIOUS TRANSLATORS h gi h t g h i “Why Did China Set Up an Oil Rig Within Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” A it P i h gi h h u M.A. MINOR PROGRAMME THESIS Field: English Linguistics Code: 60220201 HANOI - 2016
VIETNAM NATIONAL UNIVERSITY, HANOI UNIVERSITY OF LANGUAGES AND INTERNATIONAL STUDIES FACULTY OF POST - GRADUATE STUDIES ************ NGUYỄN THU HẰNG TRANSLATION QUALITY EVALUATION OF ANKIT PANDA’S ARTICLE “WHY DID CHINA SET UP AN OIL RIG WITHIN VIETNAMESE WATERS? WHY NOW AND WHY VIETNAM?” BY FOUR VARIOUS TRANSLATORS h gi h t g h i “Why Did China Set Up an Oil Rig Within Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” A it P i h gi h h u M.A. MINOR PROGRAMME THESIS Field: English Linguistics Code: 60220201 Supervisor: Assoc. Prof. Dr. Lê Hùng Tiến HANOI - 2016
DECLARATION OF AUTHORSHIP I, the undersigned, hereby certify my authority of the study project report entitled “Translation quality evaluation of Ankit Panda‟s article “Why did China set up an oil rig within Vietnamese waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” by four various translations” submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements of the Degree of Master in English Linguistics. Except where the reference is indicated, no other person‟s work has been used without due acknowledgment in the text of the thesis. Hanoi, February 2016 Nguyễn Thu Hằng i
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS This thesis could not have been completed without the help and support from a number of people. First and foremost, I would like to express my sincerest gratitude to my supervisor, Assoc. Prof. Dr. Lê Hùng Tiến, who has patiently and constantly supported me through the stages of the study, and whose stimulating ideas, expertise, and suggestions have inspired me greatly through my growth as an academic researcher. A special word of thanks goes to all the teachers of the Faculty of Post - Graduate Studies at University of Languages and International Studies, Vietnam National University, Hanoi for their useful lectures, assistance and enthusiasm during my course. Without their support and encouragement, it would never have been possible for me to have this thesis accomplished. Last but not least, I am greatly indebted to my family, especially my parents, my husband and my younger brother for the sacrifice they have devoted to the fulfillment of this academic work. ii
ABSTRACT There is a fact that in the current era of information explosion, daily contents published on the Internet have neglected strict censorship in advance in terms of quantity and quality. It can be seen that many English - Vietnamese translations cannot ensure enough precise information or convey emotion and intentions of the author in the source language text appropriately. Even some of them have modified on purpose by adding individual opinions or comments of the translators. Therefore, it is necessary to control the quality of the translations before publication so that the readers can enjoy the best edition. This thesis is an attempt to assess the quality of four different versions of for an online English article on The Diplomat basing on the schema of Translation Quality Assessment proposed by Newmark. By this way, the writer has found that the translations have obtained a certain success. However, it still reveals some mismatches between the source text and the target text, especially in terms of reflecting the intention of the author accurately. In addition, some other mistakes in terms of word choice and structure arrangement which may affect the conciseness of the translations are also pointed out. From the basis of the findings, some implications are made along with suggestions for further studies. iii
TABLE OF CONTENTS DECLARATION OF AUTHORSHIP ............................................................... i ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS .............................................................................. ii ABSTRACT ..................................................................................................... iii TABLE OF CONTENTS ................................................................................ vii LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS .......................................................................... vi LIST OF TABLES AND DIAGRAMS ........................................................... vi A: INTRODUCTION...................................................................................... 1 1. Rationale of the study ................................................................................ 1 2. Aims of the study ....................................................................................... 4 3. Scope of the study ...................................................................................... 4 4. Significance of the study ............................................................................ 5 5. Research methodology ............................................................................... 5 5.1. Research questions .............................................................................. 5 5.2. Research approach .............................................................................. 5 5.3. Research method .................................................................................. 5 5.4. Data analysis ....................................................................................... 6 6. Design of the thesis .................................................................................... 6 PART B: DEVELOPMENT........................................................................... 8 CHAPTER 1: LITERATURE REVIEW...................................................... 8 1.1. Translation theory ................................................................................... 8 1.1.1. Translation definition ........................................................................ 8 1.1.2. Translation methods & procedures ................................................... 9 1.1.3. Translation equivalence .................................................................. 13 1.1.4. Translation assessment ................................................................... 16 1.1.5. Contrastive Analysis ....................................................................... 21 1.2. Previous studies..................................................................................... 21 iv
1.3. Summary ............................................................................................... 22 CHAPTER 2: APPLICATION OF NEWMARK’S MODEL FOR TRANSLATION QUALITY ASSESSMENT ............................................ 24 2.1. Step 1: A brief analysis of the SL text stressing its intention and its functional aspects ......................................................................................... 24 2.2. Step 2: The translator‟s interpretation of the SL text‟s purpose, his translation method and the translation‟s likely readership .......................... 25 2.3. Step 3: A selective but representative detailed comparison of the translation with the original ......................................................................... 27 2.3.1. Word choice & expression .............................................................. 27 2.3.2. Structures ........................................................................................ 30 2.4. Step 4: An evaluation of the translation................................................ 38 2.4.1. An evaluation of the translation in the translator‟s terms ............... 38 2.4.2. An evaluation of the translation in the critic‟s term ....................... 45 2.4.3. Assess the translation as a piece of writing, independently of its original ...................................................................................................... 46 2.5. Step 5: An assessment of the likely place of the translation in the target language culture or discipline ......................................................... 47 PART C: CONCLUSION............................................................................. 48 REFERENCES .............................................................................................. 51 APPENDIX A ................................................................................................... I APPENDIX B................................................................................................. IV APPENDIX C ........................................................................................... XVII v
LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS ST: Source Text TT: Target Text SL: Source Language TL: Target Language V1: Version 1 (the first version) V2: Version 2 (the second version) V3: Version 3 (the third version) V4: Version 4 (the fourth version) TQA: Translation Quality Assessment P: Paragraph S: Sentence vi
LIST OF TABLES AND DIAGRAMS Table 1 Comparing versions in terms of words and expression 28 Table 2 Comparing versions in terms of denotative meanings 29 Table 3 Comparing versions in terms of separation and combination 30 Table 4 Comparing versions in terms of word order 31 Table 5 Comparing versions in terms of complex sentences and 33 relative clauses Table 6 Comparing versions in terms of passive and active forms 38 Table 7 Mistakes in the translation in terms of grammar 44 Diagram 1 Translation methods 10 Diagram 2 A scheme for analyzing and comparing original and translation 19 texts vii
A: INTRODUCTION 1. Rationale of the study In human history, cultural exchange commenced along with the emergence of culture. Translation, a cultural phenomenon and a means of cultural exchange, has brought a community beyond its spatial and temporal dimensions as contended by Kelly (2004): “Without translation, there is no history of the world.” Without translation, our world would encompass secluded oases, which would develop separately and their own histories without contributing to the world history. In fact, translation not only brings new knowledge horizons for humanity, but translation activities can also promote exchange of civilization and culture among the people and the nations worldwide. Therefore, it can be said that since its beginning days, translation has played a very important role for years. In Vietnam, after 1945, translation industry has developed and had great contribution to economic, cultural, and social development of our country. As a result, the demand for translation is increasingly diversified. An enormous number of books and documents need to be translated. The mass media such as radios, televisions, newspapers are also required to transfer information from foreign languages into Vietnamese to convey to the public. The contracts, project documents, data in need of translation in the administrative transactions, trade, and international cooperation also surged. The foreign movies should have captions or subtitles in Vietnamese. In addition, training sessions of professional interpreters are also being conducted at many universities in Vietnam to train a large team of people working in the translation field. Generally, neither translation nor interpretation in our country has not become a professional job. Sharing the same point, Ms. Tôn Nữ Thị Ninh, former Deputy Chairman of Foreign Relations Committee of Vietnam‟s National Assembly said in the event "International Conference on Translation and Language" (Translator Day) held on December 13, 2013, “Translation in Vietnam has not 1
really been developed into a profession with high professionalism because of the lack of formal standards; then, the discipline in this work is not high and it is difficult to distinguish the level of translation.” It is a fact that this has led to bad even serious consequences. Sadly, Vietnam has been listed one of countries with the worst quality of translated versions. Tùy Phong, the author of the article “Bao giờ mới hết những chữ vô hồn” on the vietnamnet expressed his own opinions about “translation disasters”. According to him, besides rather successfully-translated masterpieces such as “Wuthering Heights” (Đồi gió hú), “Harry Porter”, “The Centaur in the Garden” (Con nhân mã ở trong vườn), some classic works such as “Lolita” translated by Dương Tường, “The Da Vinci Code” (Mật mã Da Vinci) by Đỗ Thu Hà and some other textbooks have been called “translation disasters” with dozens of mistakes. These works have received a lot of negative criticism and opinions from the public and on mass media. This has become great concern for critics, translators, and linguistics. However, unfortunately, until now, we have had no works specialized in theory and method of translation between English and Vietnamese in our country, but only focusing on the study of translation practice while foreign countries have many relevant works between English and other languages by such famous authors as Nida, Newmark, Campbell, Baker, Bell, Hatim and Mason. These projects have contributed greatly in the development of theory as well practice of the translation and promoted the quality of translated versions more efficiently and professionally. Translation is indeed a challenging job. In order to produce a high-quality translation, translators are required to have both talent and flexibility in every circumstance. In addition, they also have to hone their skills regularly, their love for translation, as well as abundant knowledge of culture, society, human beings and even equivalent languages. Sometimes, because of lacking certain understanding or translators‟ carelessness, translated versions may not be concise and clear enough. Even more seriously, they can transfer messages which writers or authors want to 2
try to convey to readers in a wrong way. Such errors will have bad effect on the public for long time, especially the information on the mass media such televisions and newspapers. Therefore, the usage of vocabulary on the mass media in general and translation in particular requires both high quality and professionalism. An M.A. theses review at universities in Vietnam shows that many assessment works related to literature, and some specialized terms, including law, economy, health care, and culture have been conducted. These are preliminary studies on applying a new theory of translation evaluation and criticism into the assessment of translated versions from English into Vietnamese with remarkable results in terms of theory and practice. However, the number of political versions is still limited, especially sensitive political issues. Since information technology developed fast, the right of free press has been promoted. Correspondents, journalists, writers have had a big playground on the Internet, especially online newspaper pages or websites. Every day, they can easily provide the latest information for readers without considering contents or vocabularies strictly before publishing them. In addition, some bad elements also took advantage of the Internet to distort and communicate false information to the readers. This can be reflected clearly through contents in tabloid newpapers. Remarkably, so far, many stories, talks, interviews and articles have kept discussing a hot topic - oil rig HYSY-981 on the mass media, especially on some famous newspapers and magazines. Among them, “The Diplomat”, a premier international current-affairs magazine for the Asia-Pacific region is known by many scholars and readers. Since 2002, “The Diplomat” has been dedicated to quality analysis and commentary on events occurring in Asia and around the world. So, news on this press is very abundant and comprehensive. Many Vietnamese translators have used this useful source to explore information and try to transfer equivalent meanings of articles. However, it is regretful that many of them are incorrect and incomplete versions with grammar and vocabulary mistakes, even with wrong messages to the 3
readers. This made meaningful articles become difficult for everyone to understand and in one way have negative impacts on the readers as well. From the above-mentioned reasons, the author decided to find out a typical article with various translated versions, and then finally chose the topic “Translation quality evaluation of Ankit Panda‟s article “Why Did China Set Up an Oil Rig Within Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” by four various translators” for her thesis. 2. Aims of the study In this research, an attempt will be made to review the quality of English- Vietnamese versions in terms of conveying the intention of the author, and then recommend some criteria for better translation of political articles. 3. Scope of the study The chosen English article “Why Did China Set Up an Oil Rig Within Vietnamese Waters? Why now and why Vietnam?” by Ankit Panda on “The Diplomat” consists of nine paragraphs in total. In the limitation of a thesis, the author only selects some representative examples to analyze the intention of the author expressed in the original in translations with a clear study framework - Newmark‟s TQA model. Four respective translated versions are also selected including:  1st version: “Vì sao Trung Quốc thiết lập giàn khoan trong vùng biển Việt Nam? Vì sao là lúc này và vì sao Việt Nam?” by Đàm Hà Khánh on http://nghiencuulichsu.com;  2nd version: “Tại sao Trung Quốc đưa giàn khoan vào vùng biển Việt Nam? Tại sao lại vào lúc này, và tại sao lại là Việt Nam?” by Vũ Thị Phương Anh on http://tiasang.com.vn;  3rd version: “Tại sao Trung Quốc đặt giàn khoan vào vùng biển Việt Nam? Tại sao lại vào thời điểm này và tại sao lại là Việt Nam?” by C.K on http://tinmoi.vn; 4
 4th version: “Tại sao Trung Quốc lại triển khai giàn khoan trong vùng biển Việt Nam? Tại sao diễn ra vào thời điểm này và tại sao mục tiêu lại là Việt Nam?” by Văn Cường on http://nghiencuubiendong.vn. These sources are available on the Internet and main websites to share information as well as propaganda on islands and waters of Vietnam. 4. Significance of the study - Theoretical aspect: This research helps readers have a general overview of translation theory meanwhile they can know how to apply TQA model by Newmark in evaluating translated versions. - Practical aspect: Factually, this study is somehow useful for translators and translation critics in translating materials from English into Vietnamese in general; whereas it also gives some tips for them to handle problems arising during translation process, especially issues related to sensitive political contents. Moreover, it is also hoped that the results of this study will contribute to assessing the translation of press works based on a specific model. 5. Research methodology 5.1. Research questions In the research, the author focuses on 2 following research questions:  Question 1: To what extent do the translations convey the intention of the author?  Question 2: What are the recommendations for the translation of political articles? 5.2. Research approach During evaluation process, Contrastive Analysis approach will be applied to compare and assess translated versions against the original one. 5.3. Research method Firstly, the original text will be read thoroughly and comprehensively based on Newmark‟s reading procedures. After that, the source text will be compared to its respective translations. 5
5.4. Data analysis The author evaluates the Vietnamese translated versions based on the 5-step model of Peter Newmark:  Step 1: A brief analysis of the SL text stressing its intention and its functional aspects  Step 2: The translator‟s interpretation of the SL text‟s purpose, his translation method and the translation‟s likely readership  Step 3: A selective but representative detailed comparison of the translation with the original  Step 4: An evaluation of the translation: (a) in the translator‟s terms, (b) in the critic‟s terms, (c) assess the translation as a piece of writing, independently of its original.  Step 5: Where appropriate, an assessment of the likely place of the translation in the target language culture or discipline. 6. Design of the thesis The thesis is divided into 3 main parts.  Part A: Introduction (This part provides readers an overview of the thesis including the rationale for the study, the aims, the scope, the methodology, and the organization of the study)  Part B: Development (This part consists of 2 chapters). Chapter 1: Literature review This part discusses the theoretical background knowledge related to translation including definition, translation methods, translation procedures, translation equivalence, translation assessment, and contrastive analysis. Then the author reviews previous related studies, explains clearly the reason why she has decided to choose TQA of Peter Newmark and contrastive analysis approach to assess versions. Chapter 2: Application of Newmark’s model for TQA 6
This is the main part of the study. In this chapter, the author applies comparison and analysis between original texts and translation versions, and discusses about five-step TQA model by Newmark mentioned above to assess Vietnamese versions.  Part III: Conclusion This part will summarize the main ideas and findings of the study. Then, some conclusion will be drawn. 7
PART B: DEVELOPMENT CHAPTER 1: LITERATURE REVIEW 1.1. Translation theory 1.1.1. Translation definition “Since human beings speak different tongues, translation exists.” (Steiner, 1975: 51). The activity of translation has a long-standing tradition and has been widely developed throughout the history. In our rapidly changing world with widening cultural exchanges, its role has become of paramount importance. Undoubtedly, the twentieth century has been called “the age of translation” (Jumpelt, 1961). However, it is not easy to find out a general definition of the translation. Until now, about 200 various concepts can be mentioned. They are different angles, from the general to the more specialized. In the limit of this thesis, the author only mentions some key opinions to help readers have some general overview about the real nature of translation and related knowledge. Originally, translation comes from “translation” or “traduce” in Latin, meaning “to carry across” or “to lead across”. Translation is like the bridge to give instructions and connect. In fact, it is a process of transformation of terms and meanings from one language into another language, from the original language, the source language to the target language. So, it can be understood that translation is encryption of meaning and form of the target language through deciphering the meaning and form of the source language. As Hatim and Munday (2004) pointed out in a similar definition, translation can be analyzed from two different perspectives: that of a „process‟, which refers to the activity of turning a ST into a TT in another language, and that of a „product‟, i.e. a translated text. Catford described it in these terms: “Translation is the replacement of textual material in one language (SL) by equivalent textual material in other 8
language (TL).” (Catford, 1965:20) Apparently, he was much concerned about maintaining a kind of “equivalence” between the ST and the TT. Sharing the same point, Hartman & Stock (1972) considered translation to be the replacement of a representation of a text in one language by a representation of another equivalent in a second language. One of the rather detailed definitions with the most remarkableness was proposed by Peter Newmark (1988: 7). In his opinion, translation is “a craft” that attempts to replace a message in a written form by the “same” message in another message. Shuttleworth and Cowie (1997) see that translation is a very broad notion which opens the way to be understood in various ways. This broad notion enables one to talk about translation as process and a product. In addition, one can recognize sub-types of translations such as literary translation, technical translation, subtitling and machine translation. Clearly, no matter how diverse these definitions can be, they all share the same feature which emphasizes the importance of finding the closet equivalence in meaning by the choice of appropriate target language‟s lexical and grammatical structures, communication situation, and cultural context. 1.1.2. Translation methods & procedures According to Lê Hùng Tiến (2006), to be successful in evaluating the translation quality, the critic must have the knowledge of basic matters of translation theory such as the nature, procedures, methods and equivalence of translation. In order to translate a text from a SL into a TL, the translator must use some certain methods and procedures, sometimes a combination of them. While translation methods relate to the whole text, translation procedures are used for sentences and the smaller units of language. 1.1.2.1. Translation methods The eight different translation methods suggested by Newmark can be shown through the following diagram: 9
SL emphasis TL emphasis Word-for-word translation Adaptation Literal translation Free translation Faithful translation Idiomatic translation Semantic translation Communicative translation Diagram 1: Translation methods (Newmark, 1988: 45) From the diagram, it is clear that the relationship of each method with the SL and the TL is different. The position of each method (higher to lower in comparison with the SL or the TL) reflects not only the distance with the SL and the TL but also the features of the translation product created by a respective method: whether it is more alike to the SL or the TL (Lê Hùng Tiến, 2006). For example, word-for-word translation method creates the product characterizing the most features of the SL and adaptation give birth to a translation version which is the most alike to the TL. Each method can be explained briefly, as follows:  Word-for-word translation: The SL word-order is preserved and words translated singly by their most common meaning, out of context.  Literal translation: The SL grammatical constructions are converted to their nearest TL equivalents but the lexical words are translated singly, out of context.  Faithful translation: It attempts to reproduce the precise contextual meaning of the original within the constraints of the TL grammatical structures.  Semantic translation: It takes more account of the aesthetic value of the SL text than faithful translation, compromising on „meaning‟ where appropriate so 10
that assonance, word-lay or repetition jars in the finished version. Therefore, it is more flexible, allows for the translator‟s intuitive empathy with the original.  Adaptation: The themes, characters, plots are preserved, and the SL culture is converted to the TL culture and the text is rewritten.  Free translation: It is usually a paraphrase much longer than the original, a so-called „Intralingual translation‟, often prolix and pretentious, and not translation at all.  Idiomatic translation: It reproduces the „message‟ of the original but tends to distort nuances of meaning by preferring colloquialisms and idioms where these do not exist in the original.  Communicative translation: It attempts to render the exact contextual meaning of the original in such a way that both content and language are readily acceptable and comprehensible to the readership. (Newmark, 1988: 45) Among these methods, Newmark put emphasis on only two methods, semantic and communicative translation. In his opinion, they are appropriate to any text. Semantic translation focuses on primarily upon the semantic content of the source text, whereas communicative translation focuses essentially upon the comprehension and response of the receptors. Some translation researchers and theorists say that how Newmark classifies translation methods is too complicated and theoretical and not practical. However, others support Newmark‟s own translation methods. In fact, application of translation methods is required to be flexible. Translators can apply Newmark‟s translation methods and others creatively during translation process of texts in general and terms in particular effectively. 1.1.2.2. Translation procedures In terms of translation procedures, there still exist some controversial about what name to call this category. Some authors use the term “procedure” while some others prefer the term “techniques” or “strategies”. Whatever it is called, we can 11